Avery's Campaign Journal

The Campaign In Canada

June 29/2004

Well, the pollsters were wrong. I didn't win. I wish I could tell you I was that one "Other" seat, but I'm not.

Which means I got to go find a real job.

We voted in a guy we didn't much trust but only because we trusted the other guy even less. There are probably a lot of folks who voted Liberal today who are wishing they hadn't; up in Ontario they are known as "suckers."

So what have we got? Canada is a nation that is split into three parts; Harpo can go back to building his firewall, and Belinda Stronach still isn't returning my phone calls (I'm not after her money, I honestly think we'd make a cute couple).

For those of you who voted - you've now got a free pass to bitch and moan for the next 6 to 24 months about the Liberals, Conservatives, and the rest of the castaways on Parliament Island… And then we'll do it all again!

For those of you who didn't vote - you didn't have anything to do with this, so you can't complain. Which is part of the resulting "real fun of voting."

(And as a personal note to Harpo: I know you went home last night and cried bitter tears into your pillow, but fear not my robotic despot - this ain't over. Oh, and remember, your mom thinks you're a winner, and that's all that really counts.)

So while my dreams of running this country and ruling you may be dashed to bits (for the time being), I've still got my buggy eyes set on America. And let's fact it, if I'm running America, I'm essentially king of the universe.

Starting tomorrow, I'll begin "Avery's Savory Journal." In it, I'll be spewing out jokes, skits, and, because it's Latin for "it does not follow," plenty of non-sequiturs.

Oh, and of course, I'll keep on with my USA campaign journal.

June 28/2004
June 27/2004
June 26/2004
June 25/2004
June 24/2004
June 23/2004
Canadian Archives

The Campaign In Canada

The Campaign In the USA