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Avery's
Campaign Journal
The Campaign In Canada
June 7/2004
Here's
how the Canadian political "blame of command" is playing these
days. Let's say a right-wing, rolling pin wielding homophobe (let's call
her, oh, I don't know, Cheryl Gallant), says she thinks her campy Conservative
chums want to repeal the hate laws because they ban the incitement of
hatred against people of different sexual orientation. That's when Paul
Martin's liberals jump in by saying that they are in internal conflict
over the issue, but that the Harper camp's right wing views are in keeping
with that party's plan to squash Canadians' fundamental Charter rights.
Then NDPer Jack "Sound Blight" Layton weighs in by saying that
Canadians who prize these human rights have just as much to fear from
Kaiser Paul as they do "Hair Steve." That's when Mr. Harris
(I'll give him a nick name when he actually ends up on the radar screen)
from The Green Party fires off a press release saying that although no
one bothered to ask him or read his press release, he thinks that the
Liberals, Conservative and NDP parties are not only soft on human rights
but on environmental issues as well. Next, Marc-Boris St-Maurice, of the
Marijuana Party chimes in saying that we should all just mellow out over
some serious hydroponic doobage and let human rights do their thing, man.
The Communist Party sends out a typewritten release saying not only do
we already have too many human rights, but we have too many fashion choices
and what's wrong with the colour gray anyway? The Marxist-Leninist Party
one-betters its socialist counter-part by handing out barely legible,
hand scrawled pamphlets stating that when the fateful day arrives, all
people of "suspicious, nonconformist and questionable orientation
will simply be shot." The Canadian Action Party calls a press conference
and admits that its party isn't nearly as exciting as its name. And me,
Avery Ant… Well, while I'd like to say I can't take any of these
jokers too seriously, the fact is that I'm being stalked by Gilles Duceppe
and I gather that if I don't surrender myself to his lusts ASAP, he intends
to seriously harm my pet rabbit.
June 6/2004
June 5/2004
June 4/2004
June
3/2004
June 2/2004
June
1/2004
Canadian Archives
The
Campaign In Canada
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