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Campaign Journal Bill (Who’s Your Daddy?) Clinton came to sell his book on “Late Show with David Letterman” Tuesday night but left a copy as a gift for Letterman’s son. (Yeah, a 957-page book, that’s just what every 9 month-old wants!) Reading some of the many lurid sexual descriptions and bonking encounters from his hefty 50 lb. memoir, the former president took up the entire 90-minute show but relieved some of the tedium by showing Mr. Letterman a pack of playing cards with naked women on them. Mr. Clinton did however find a second to wish Harry Letterman (Dave’s son) a happy 9-month birthday. “With luck,” Clinton went on, “you will grow up to bag lots of chicks and those around you will tolerate your not-so-subtle-indiscretions and sexual harassment.” Looking natty in a leopard skin t-shirt and rubber pants, Clinton, also managed to take a second and plug Sen. John Kerry, the newly anointed Democratic presidential candidate. “Of all the repressed morons I dealt with in Congress,” Clinton said in part, “he at least stayed out of my way. He was never there. And I appreciated that. And, if I can’t be president, then, well, why not him?” When asked whether the economy or the war in Iraq would be the deciding issue in the presidential election, Clinton replied, “Do you think that hottie in the front row would do me?” Mostly serious while interviewing Clinton, Letterman posed a mischievous question as their session neared an end “Tell me what you know about Sandy Berger sticking documents in his pants and walking out of the National Archives,” Letterman asked. Clinton chuckled, then praised his former national security adviser’s penis size. “Anybody that ever saw Sandy Berger’s engorged pants, know he has a big one,” Clinton grinned. “He’s got a well-endowed salami and I seriously doubt there would be room for anything else down there.” Aug 3 / 2004 |
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